Arriving early

Always tell people it will take you 30 minutes longer to get somewhere than it actually takes. This way you are always early and look punctual, when you do run late you will look perfectly on time.

I don't know if all the airlines flying to st louis do this on purpose, but they are very reliably 30 minutes early.

More flight room

When flying on an open seating airline like southwest, bring a bunch of items a baby would need on a flight. Things like a stuffed animal, a small blanket, etc. Place them out on the seat next to you no one will want to sit there and you can have extra space.

Running a cab company

Start a cab company.  When you pick up people with foreign accents automatically take them to the wrong location and then just say that you misheard them.  Then deliver them to the correct location and still charge the full total.

This one brought to you in part by the shady cab system in London.

Flight hacks

When flying always carry a set of earbuds even if you don't have an mp3 player. That way if you really don't want to talk to the person next to you, you can just put them in.  They will either think you are listening to music or crazy enough that they shouldn't speak with you.

Credit Card Companies

Create a credit card company specifically designed to appeal to traveling customers.  Then lock down accounts when people leave the state or country where they reside.  Have your help center designed to immediately unlock the card so that you can claim a very high percentage of successful help center calls.

Thank you very much traveling credit card.  I'm glad I got you in the first place.

Fist Fights

If you know you are going to get in a fight ahead of time be sure to rub habanero pepper all over your cheeks.  This way even if you lose the fight, when the person who hits you rubs their eyes or touches their own facial wounds later they will experience the fiery burn of revenge.

Repentance

Live your life however you want committing all of the seven sins.  Be greedy and take from others, be envious of those that have more than you, etc.  Then at "the end" all you have to do is repent and you will be forgiven.  Maybe all those cats on wall street figured they could have it work out this way.  Too bad the court system doesn't allow you to just repent.